LGBT: Gays & Catholics in SE Michigan

Posted by Brandon | Filed under Cool People, life, people

Tom Nelson and Linda Karie-Nelson of Farmington Hills are Catholic and each have a gay son. And they are fighting to make the anti-gay Catholic church a more hospitable place.

Jessica Carreras wrote a touching story in Between the Lines this week profiling two Catholic parents who are working hard to help other parents reconcile their faith with the fact that they have a gay person in their family.  Tom Nelson, 80, and Linda Karie-Nelson, 69, each have a gay child from a prior marriage.  They met at the Detroit Chapter of PFLAG (Parents, Families, & Friends of Lesbians and Gays) and eventually married.  The range of their activism is incredible and Michigan gays are fortunate to have such committed allies.

Having a gay child makes you suddenly realize that the unconditional love of a parent supercedes any religious doctrine.  It just puts that on the side.  I know my son is not disordered, as the [Catholic] church would have me believe.  –Tom Nelson

More on this couple’s impressive range of activities, a touching story about a parent standing up for his child during a church service, and some links to key resources for LGBT families and allies, after the jump . . .

Jessica captures Tom’s bravery in the following vignette concerning Michigan’s anti-gay marriage Proposition 2 which a local cardinal asked Catholic churches to support in 2004:

Just before the election [the cardinal] put out an audio tape and told every parish they had to play it on Sunday.  They started to play that tape and I had a wave of emotion come over me that’s indescribable. . . . I walked to the alter, turned around and faced the congregation and in my loudest voice, I said, ‘This is a message of hate. It hurts me, it hurts my family and it hurts my friends. I don’t come to church on Sunday to hear a message of hate. I have to leave.’ –Tom Nelson

Here is a partial list of the wide range of activities that Linda and Tom take part in to advance the cause of equal rights and religious understanding:

  • Tom and Linda are board members of Fortunate Families (Linda’s the Vice President), a group of Catholic families with LGBT children.  Fortunate Families runs a “Listening Parents Network” which connects parents with each other to listen and provide wisdom re LGBT issues.
  • They are members of PFLAG Detroit
  • They advocate for equal rights by writing and speaking to legislators [I wonder if they've ever heard back from Gary Peters -- I haven't, despite several letters, emails, and visits to a town hall meeeting, regarding the Uniting American Families Act.]
  • They are involved with Always Our Children, which meets with local congregations willing to have a dialogue about LGBT issues
  • They founded a PFLAG group in Manistee, Michigan, a conservative part of the state where they have a vacation home
  • Most importantly, they are patient — not strident — and talk to anyone who is willing to listen to them.

Phew!  In the face of a lot of negative news lately re LGBT rights in New York, Maine, etc., it’s heartening to hear about such powerful advocates.  Thanks, Tom and Linda!

Check out the full article at Pride Source.

Related posts:

  1. LGBT: Coming Out in Middle School
  2. Expanded LGBT Coverage @ the urbane life
  3. LGBT: National Equality March
  4. Brandon’s Back!
  5. Stars of ‘The Last Airbender’ talk moviemaking, Michigan, a little thing called ‘Twilight’

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Permalink | December 4th, 2009

6 Responses to “LGBT: Gays & Catholics in SE Michigan”

  1. Ryan Meray Says:
    December 4th, 2009 at 10:10 pm

    Homophobia is probably the greatest bigotries left when you look at them on a global scale, and it’s refreshing to read about some straight people who are willing to stand up and speak out against the hatred espoused so openly by many.

  2. Brandon Says:
    December 5th, 2009 at 10:36 am

    Thanks for the comment, Ryan. This couple has really done a wonderful thing — challenging their own beliefs and trying to help others to cope with, and then embrace, a situation that they do not fully understand. Gay people need straight allies willing to stand up and say, this is wrong.

  3. Janet Says:
    December 5th, 2009 at 7:07 pm

    Wonderful couple! Wonderful story! Thanks for highlighting their work. The Catholic church is a big mountain to push, but without people like this couple, it will not move.

  4. Cindy L Says:
    December 5th, 2009 at 10:35 pm

    Tom is the father of a dear friend of mine, and I am very proud to know these people. God bless them, and the work they do!

  5. Brandon Says:
    December 6th, 2009 at 4:47 pm

    Thanks, Janet and Cindy! One of my favorite parts of writing for this blog is highlighting cool people and cool businesses who are making in a difference. I’m glad you both appreciate it.

  6. Debra Wise Says:
    March 24th, 2010 at 1:32 pm

    So Sorry I missed last weeks meeting. I had to work. Plus I need to be put on the email list. Sincerely Ms. Deb

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